Three years after the last post! I just went back and read the last post and could feel the truth of every word in it. And an update seems mandatory in the timeline :)
Yukti has continued to grow, blossom, unravel herself taking all of us along in our journey. The liveliness, the spirit that she brings in is unparalleled. An entertainer, a natural stand-up comedian, an explorer, never say no spirit, the I know it all spirit, self-assured, very aware of her steps and what she wants to do, the charmer that she continues to be, she is just something! We all agree that life would have been so much less lively and interesting without her. She is like the tang in a dish, the little one that bosses over all of us.
Talking about dishes, she loves food, cooking, cutting vegetables, watching others cook. So much so that these days she has started telling me, amma tomorrow you make this, discussing the menu for the next day. There are so many stories of her expression of her will and wants that I often wonder that a child like her would have been labelled a defiant, mischief making, hyperactive, attention deficit child. She certainly is not the one to fit into a structure, even at home! A free-willed child who is easy going, funny, and full of mischief.
For a while I wondered if she would understand others' feelings, whether she could express her own feelings (except feeling outraged, showing by shouting) and in the recent past I am seeing her express some emotions. Like when she said "I will miss chippy and I feel sad that she died" when a street dog chippy died recently, like when she said "i feel like crying when nidhi cries", like when she said "i missed you amma" after I was away for a few days. It is not that she is not a loving child, she is a very affectionate, loving child, but I also see how different she is - she is in the moment, does not carry from the past. The emotional imprint of events are not very strong for her, she does not hold on to pain, hurt and that is a beautiful quality that she reminds us of everyday.
While she may compete to do the things that her sister does, there is a certain naivity, innocence, and charm to every action and word of her. It is difficult not to smile even when she is clearly crossing the line! While Nidhi would negotiate the rules to her liking, yukti does not bother negotiating if she does not like the rule/boundary/limit. She will just state what she wants to do and often do it, unless of course we use brute force to make her follow our line. Her mazhalai has gone, she has turned 6, she has learned to cycle all on her own, the independent streak is quite strong, she wants to do things by herself, even the ones that she cannot. Her sense of being grounded and rooted on the land is so strong. She will spend several hours under a tree by herself. She finds her solace in the outdoors. A child of the woods, the wild child, mowgli, life on my terms is where she is at the moment. Except that we are still scared of insects :D
To give you an example of who she is:
After an episode of some mischief/crossing the line, I was telling her what I would like her to do. After I explained it I asked her to tell me what I said. And this is how our conversation went
Y - I wont tell
Me - Why?
Y - because I know you know that I know it, so I wont tell
Me (zapped and finding my bearings) - I do not know that you know it, so I am asking you to tell.
Y - I will not do it again
Me - That is not what I told you.
Y - I know that
Me - So you have to tell me what you understood of what I said
Y - Next time, if I want to .... then I check with you... (something to that extent- i don't even remember the exact incident)
Me (just as I am getting ready to sit down with nidhi for some study) - What do you want to do? Y - I want to play (or go outside or some such response)
Yukti has continued to grow, blossom, unravel herself taking all of us along in our journey. The liveliness, the spirit that she brings in is unparalleled. An entertainer, a natural stand-up comedian, an explorer, never say no spirit, the I know it all spirit, self-assured, very aware of her steps and what she wants to do, the charmer that she continues to be, she is just something! We all agree that life would have been so much less lively and interesting without her. She is like the tang in a dish, the little one that bosses over all of us.
Talking about dishes, she loves food, cooking, cutting vegetables, watching others cook. So much so that these days she has started telling me, amma tomorrow you make this, discussing the menu for the next day. There are so many stories of her expression of her will and wants that I often wonder that a child like her would have been labelled a defiant, mischief making, hyperactive, attention deficit child. She certainly is not the one to fit into a structure, even at home! A free-willed child who is easy going, funny, and full of mischief.
For a while I wondered if she would understand others' feelings, whether she could express her own feelings (except feeling outraged, showing by shouting) and in the recent past I am seeing her express some emotions. Like when she said "I will miss chippy and I feel sad that she died" when a street dog chippy died recently, like when she said "i feel like crying when nidhi cries", like when she said "i missed you amma" after I was away for a few days. It is not that she is not a loving child, she is a very affectionate, loving child, but I also see how different she is - she is in the moment, does not carry from the past. The emotional imprint of events are not very strong for her, she does not hold on to pain, hurt and that is a beautiful quality that she reminds us of everyday.
While she may compete to do the things that her sister does, there is a certain naivity, innocence, and charm to every action and word of her. It is difficult not to smile even when she is clearly crossing the line! While Nidhi would negotiate the rules to her liking, yukti does not bother negotiating if she does not like the rule/boundary/limit. She will just state what she wants to do and often do it, unless of course we use brute force to make her follow our line. Her mazhalai has gone, she has turned 6, she has learned to cycle all on her own, the independent streak is quite strong, she wants to do things by herself, even the ones that she cannot. Her sense of being grounded and rooted on the land is so strong. She will spend several hours under a tree by herself. She finds her solace in the outdoors. A child of the woods, the wild child, mowgli, life on my terms is where she is at the moment. Except that we are still scared of insects :D
To give you an example of who she is:
After an episode of some mischief/crossing the line, I was telling her what I would like her to do. After I explained it I asked her to tell me what I said. And this is how our conversation went
Y - I wont tell
Me - Why?
Y - because I know you know that I know it, so I wont tell
Me (zapped and finding my bearings) - I do not know that you know it, so I am asking you to tell.
Y - I will not do it again
Me - That is not what I told you.
Y - I know that
Me - So you have to tell me what you understood of what I said
Y - Next time, if I want to .... then I check with you... (something to that extent- i don't even remember the exact incident)
Me (just as I am getting ready to sit down with nidhi for some study) - What do you want to do? Y - I want to play (or go outside or some such response)
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